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The Brassican Heresy (repost)

Warning: The following post is long, and may contain insults to French people. And Christians. And probably frogs.

[Repost from Jan 18, 2012]

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I’d like to propose to you a daring hypothesis.

You may be surprised by it. You may be stunned. You might even be shocked. Because this is such a daring idea, some of you reading this right now may actually be horrified. There’s even the possibility – distant, but real, so I have to warn you – that one or more people about to read the following hypothesis will suffer deep psychological damage and end up under permanent psychiatric care, or possibly even comatose.

I don’t really want to just spring it on you suddenly. This is something so new, so different, so deeply significant, that I feel very strongly that it should have its own screen. It’s just not something I feel okay with plopping down in a sea of insignificant words, as if it were one common grain of sand on a vast beach.

This is something so special it demands treatment you’d immediately consider … unusual.

So. If you think you’re ready for it, brace yourself and look below the break. Here it comes: Continue reading “The Brassican Heresy (repost)”

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You Sleigh Me

In fond memory of cooler days, here’s a pic from back when I drove sleighs and haywagons for a living.

That’s me on the driver’s seat. Up front are my coal black Percheron draft horses, Esther and Jim, both close to a ton in weight. Running alongside is my German shepherd best friend, Ranger the Valiant Warrior.

This was the early 1990s, and I was already happily godless.

 

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Oh, Shit! — or — Why Things Are Always So Fucked Up

I’ve thought for many years about why “otherwise intelligent” people can believe or say certain things that are demonstrably false. I mean, there are people who can look and sound as smart as anyone you know, but who don’t “get” certain things. Who WON’T get certain things.

For instance, you can know someone who is a fantastic organizer or salesman, someone who can get rich in running a business, handing every detail easily, but who can’t accept global warming, or evolution … even when you explain it.

This popped into my head this morning: Continue reading “Oh, Shit! — or — Why Things Are Always So Fucked Up”

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UnJeeped Comrade Conveys Thanks

Former “desert warrior” Chris Clarke expressed a hasty thanks today as he jetted off to the Caribbean trailing large-denomination bills and a mysterious white powder. Thanks to the generosity of all those who donated, Chris was at last able to ditch the desert schtick and buy an island resort, which he is converting into what he referred to as “a safe haven for women struggling with a pole-dancing addiction.”

But seriously: For those late on the scene, Chris Clarke, blogger, writer, feminist, animal lover and environmental warrior of many years standing recently got his Jeep stolen for the second time. Thief #2 managed to total the vehicle during a high-speed chase, leaving our friend car-less. Chris is even getting billed for the towing charges.    Continue reading “UnJeeped Comrade Conveys Thanks”

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Desert Warrior Seeks Millionaire. Sort Of.

Chris Clarke — Desert Protective Council / Solar Done Right / Earthjustice / Earth Island Institute / Earth Island Journal / etc.

I doubt he would ask for help.

In fact, presented with this piece, I expect to hear from him, and I’m about half convinced he will be annoyed or embarrassed and ask me to take down the post.

(And then, crap, I will have to decide whether to honor his wishes in what really is a personal matter, or … you know, help him against his will.)

But …

I have this friend. He’s a distant friend, an Internet friend, someone I’ve met in person only once. But he’s a Friend, with a capital-F, probably even a Brother with a capital-B, because the world is a better place for having him in it. And goddammit, we need the world to be a better place. Continue reading “Desert Warrior Seeks Millionaire. Sort Of.”

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God Weighs In on ‘God Particle’ Discovery

“I wish people would stop bringing Me into it.”

So complained God, the supernatural superbeing and all-powerful deity of the Bible, in an exclusive interview today with FreethoughtBlogs’ Blue Collar Atheist.

We sat in a small café in Schenectady, New York. On the day after Rolf Heuer, director of European physics research center CERN, announced the likely discovery of the Higgs Boson, God appeared in a blinding flash at roughly 9:17 a.m. (all the clocks stopped, as did most of the people in the room), stepping down from a small cloud as a host of angelic cherubs kept up a continuous long choral note. Continue reading “God Weighs In on ‘God Particle’ Discovery”